One of the coolest things you can do these days is to smoke, drink and do drugs. Not only do some consider it as a sign of independence and maturity but some feel it is important to fit in the world.  After all, how can you not drink at a party, how can you say no to alcohol at office dinner, how can you enjoy a social life without something to stimulate your mind? In fact, substances such as Beer, Weed, Wine, Smoking, and occasional MDMA or Cocaine are very much acceptable. People who consume these regularly don’t even consider themselves addicts. They are all around in offices, on streets, in malls, in flashy cars, or in public buses. They can be business magnets, taxi drivers, artists, athletes, anyone actually.

Even those who stay away from this co-curricular activity during their teenage ultimately join the club in the corporate world. It is used to bond, socialize, and of course, have fun. Every smoker knows how easy it is to befriend another smoker. Some make this hobby the ultimate goal in life. After feeling dead from Monday to Friday, they wait for a Friday night to get “Wasted “- a word used to define a state in which a person takes so much that he moves beyond his state of consciousness. He becomes totally unaware of his words and actions. In this state, it is easier to lose stuff, have an accident, go to jail, get raped, or have a traumatic experience. Worst you can die of overdoses in just a few hours like the amazing jazz singer; Amy Winehouse.

When this hobby gets out of control, it is referred to as SUD in clinical terms- Substance Use Disorder. People who have this disorder are also called addicts, alcoholics, or chain smokers. Some people call it a habit, some doctors call it a disease, and some call it a mental disorder.

In reality, it is neither a habit nor a disease. It is a journey. This journey is defined without exceptions. The only difference is how far you will go. The journey starts the minute you try the substance for the very first time. The destination is death. Not everyone reaches the destination and some drop off on the way. Super lucky once drop off after the first time. Some are consistent. Many are way beyond the risk threshold but stay in denial. Some rock stars reach the very end. That is death. Very few of the rock stars reach the end but they return. They get sober and start writing articles.

Let’s have a look at the journey of the rock star. This journey can be 15-20 years or just a few years but he will go through all the phases.

Beginnings

He is introduced to the substances, most likely, by a friend in his early teens. Trust me, parents don’t talk at night worrying why you have not started drinking and smoking in high school. It is mostly a friend, senior in school, or a low-quality douchebag boyfriend whom you think is a rockstar bad boy. This is where he takes his first sip, his first drag. Most people don’t feel good after the first time but the stud feels terrific. His journey has begun. There is no looking back now. He will go till the very end. Nothing on the planet can stop him.

Comfort Zone

He accelerates to weekly drinking sessions and buying full cigarette packs. He gets comfortable as if he was born to do this. His friend circle expands. All of them users. Those who don’t do or don’t support his addiction are no more his friends. A new person with cocky body language and confidence is born. He thinks he is cool. He takes pride in smoking and drinking more than others. He is appreciated for his enormous capacity and he loves it. By now he is constantly looking for more money to buy, planning sessions, and smelling of cigarettes. Parents start suspecting. He starts avoiding family. He constantly lies and is alert to not get caught. Substances occupy a majority of his mental energy. His world has changed.

Exploration

Now in college, he is free and finds more acceptance and friends. He is the leader of the group. New drugs enter his life. Weed, Hash, Cocaine, LSD, MDMA, Heroin…whatever. He explores them all. He has to. It seems normal to him. He quickly settles for those he loves the most. At this stage, he seems normal except that he consumes abnormally. His philosophy of life changes. He is rebellious, cocky, and arrogant. His complete worldview changes. Sober people are not humans to him anymore. He is totally distanced from his family.

Settling Down

He is earning and is independent. He has his stuff like food. He cannot function without it. Bottles of alcohol and weed with corresponding accessories at home. It’s a part of his identity now. He fixes every day. He could drink till morning and still work the next day. He could be doped 24 / 7 and still go out for dinner. He is a champion. His work, relationships, and lifestyle support it. The Center of his life is his “fix”.

Now the question is not “ Shall I do it tomorrow ? “ but “Why didn’t I buy more? How can I be out of stuff ?“ Everything seems fine. His work, social life, and relationships all seem fine. He has the occasional “ It was too much last time“ sessions but has no idea of his problem. The idea of death or being on the street does not cross his mind. He cannot be an addict. After all, he has a college degree and has a good job. He is actually doing pretty well. After all, the world has taught him addicts are those who are not educated and lack self-control.

Discomfort

At this stage, he gets the first shock. It is usually in the late 20s or early 30s. Events like social drama, violence, losing stuff, overspending, or accidents happen more often. He is unable to understand what is going on. How can this happen to him? After all, just a year ago he was fine.

First thoughts of cutting down start. More such events happen and the first serious thought of quitting pops up. Cold turkey attempts, moving from whiskey to vodka, only with friends, only on vacations rules are formed and are broken with a drink. Lying starts increasing. Losing money, face-off with law, issues with partners, minor accidents, problems at work, anger, stealing, violence, and other issues become frequent. Friends start distancing themselves and he becomes a laughter item. He starts doing it alone and starts hiding it. He starts living a double life. He starts self-medication and suffers alone. He starts losing self-respect. He is slowly becoming helpless. Something inside says “ There is a problem but I am not an addict”. He is still in denial.

Worst, his decisions and choices in life have created an environment that he has to do with peers or colleagues. He does not know how to manage life with occasional drinking. He is pulled in 2 directions often and he is constantly in fear. He dies every day.

Crash

After a few failed cold turkey attempts and self-made rules and regulations, he cannot help. It starts pulling him like a magnet. When he does not have it, he gets desperate. He needs to find it and his determination reaches a level that he finds it no matter what. Every day he promises that today is the last day but he starts all over again. His friends think he is a nuisance and starts distancing. He either loses his job or continues but things totally fall apart. Now he is alone with his substance. He starts hating himself and his helplessness.

It is the single most important thing in his life. Every day starts with a fear of what the fuck, where is my wallet, what happened last night, did I use a condom, god what if I had gone to jail, what if I was killed, what if I had killed someone. He is very close to death or jail.

He is a social embarrassment now. He is alone. He is helpless. He has no support. Some try to help but nothing works. Now it’s him and his substance. He either dies or gets sober. Most likely he will die.

This journey is irrespective of your educational background, family, career, and intelligence. Some serious addicts are super intelligent and have exceptional profiles. If you are at any stage of this journey, take help or stop but do not continue.